In the family...

[Eclecta]

Yesterday, my 13 year old son asked me a rather mature question, which got me thinking. He asked, "Why do I always know when something is bothering you or someone else, even when you try so hard to hide it?"

I was shocked. I didn't really realize how much he was picking up on. Granted I do try to hide my fears, worries, etc from him because I don't want him to worry with me. But for him to ask that just kinda freaked me out.

I asked him a couple more questions regarding what he was talking about, and sure enough, he has pinpointed exactly what is up with me, he is picking up on my moods, my feelings, and even to a certain degree figuring things out in such a way that it is kinda scary.

He also has been picking up on moods/feelings/etc of his friends at school, teachers, even neighbors, and strangers in the grocery store. I suppose I always knew this day was coming. He really is alot like me, in some ways, but in others he is so different.

So what I did is this.. I googled Empathy and let him read up on it. Somehow a link to one of the vamp sites popped up while he was reading and of course he wanted to go there since he was sure I would know the site. It was Sphynxcat's site. Anyway, he got more and more interested and then ended up on Sangi's forums because I know it allows younger ones to post. I am also on there so I can monitor everything. He also joined the Kheperu forums since they allow younger ones on there..

I really really wanted him to join Nox, but I realize it will be a couple years before he can do that.

Anyway, he posted on there that he had awakened 'yesterday' and it just cracked me up, so I calmly told him that is something that happens over time, not in a few hours. So, he is busy in his pursuit of knowledge, trying to figure out why he feels things that his friends don't... I guess it is time I realize he is growing up. There is only so long I can think of him as a little boy.

If any of you are on Kheprian forums or Sangi's forums, say hi to him. He is really struggling right now, trying to figure out how to fit in somewhere... And really hoping he can find some other kids his age whom he can relate too. His name is Rogue Ramphart.

He still has a ways to go, but I have to try to remember to be patient and not drive him crazy trying to smother him right now. This is a time of independance and I know that so I gotta learn to back away.. and let him learn things on his own.

Any suggestions would be appreciated ... especiallly from those of you who are younger.

Hugs,

Eclecta

[Preist]

well at 13 he will be hitting puberty and i know that one it fills with pride and a second part with a little anticipation on the whole thing

But i am really glad that he has a mum that understands and he can talk to about it all if you want i will get some of the work i have at rising serpant for him to read over if its ok with you its basic stuff on working and dealing with energy something that might be good for him to keep his mind working on it i know at that age there minds are like spunges and need to soak up everything

lately my sister has told me that my neice is getting alot like me in a lot of diffrent ways mostly chararistics that she sees in me and my niece both shes starting to go through problems i went through physicaly but on a worse scale of things and at 16 i am really hoping it isnt but that just me on that one and knowing the lake of help i got until i went looking and that took me to dangerouse places and i know she wont listen to me just like uncle to rebeliouse by nature

i will take a look for him on Kheparu and send him a wee pm to say welcome

Preist

[Camazotz]

Hey hun *hugs*

Wow... big times eh? First off as I'm sure you know yourself, his empathy could be attributed to a few different things- but then I don't think you're one to jump to conclusions anyway. Whilst he may awaken as kin, he may also just be a talented young man starting to come into his own right, or even an indigo child (a term you might wish to google if you're not familiar with it). The heritage and prophecies which are my own personal field of interest indicate that many of these indigo children will be born into this generation and the next few to come as well- people who're spiritually aware, globally conscious and with high natural energy levels.

Preist's offer would be a good one to take up- it would allow him to start to learn about energy without having to ever go near terms such as sang etc which he's still too young to start thinking about.

Also he might benefit from learning something like tai chi, a martial art which deals with energy in terms that are more "acceptable" in today's society.

Finally, this might be a good time for us all to start looking again at the sanguinox teen mentoring programme which had been proposed before... if of course it turns out that he is vamp, or we have other youngsters in similar situations.

Cama

[Eclecta]

Preist.. Thanks for the offer for the articles etc. I think that would be a great idea. If you find him on Kheprian forums his name is Rouge_Ramphart. I think he would be glad to hear from someone who is male anyway. He asked if all the members on these forums were all women. LOL!!

Cama... good advice. We are taking it all slow. He already has a basic understanding of what vamps really are etc. I haven't ever gone into great detail with him, because of his age etc.. But when he began asking about empathy etc, I took that as a sign that I should introduce him to the forums. He is already a pretty active part of the Atlanta Vamp community, simply because he goes and hangs out sometimes with everyone because he likes every one and they like him. I am not trying to encourage him to show any signs of vampirism, but as many of my friends have notices as well as I have, it's only a matter of time. One friend says every time get gets near her she can feel him being a sponge. I told him today to check into sheilding and grounding.. I think once he learns how to do those two basic things, the rest will begin to fall in place with him. You could be right about him being an indigo child. It will be hard to tell just yet, which is why I feel like I can't go wrong letting him learn different things. If it turns out he isn't, then he will at least have a good understanding of who I am as well as who others he knows well are too. I haven't even suggested to him that he is vamp. I let him draw his own conclusions based on how he feels and what he is learning. He told me he awakened, and I told him he hasn't had time to awaken yet.. that its a process etc.

I realize all I can do is be patient and understanding with him no matter what is going on with him. My main concern is that he NOT ever have to go thru the feelings of "I'm the only one" and "No one understands how I really feel." Knowing knowledge is power, all I can do is give him tools so that he can understand better what to expect etc.

[Lazarus]

ahh, its so fun to watch him grow up, no if only he wouldnt be so damned.....bizzare, lol but I am sure he will grow out of that...or into it. I wish that your husband was involved in the community or had a connection strong to such things because it always good to have a male mentor in such manners during such times as he needs somone to give him advice from that perspective, I would offer but I would not have to time to do so and I know it, I have enough work as is, but hopefully he will find somone worht while to help guide him in therigh directions. whats gonna be strange is when h stops looking and sounding lke a kid, that gonna be just wierd for me but I supppose its unavoidable. well C**** time to grow up kid, have fun, its gonna be hell and bliss at the same time, always is for poeple like us.

[Camazotz]

Eclecta you're a great mom hun and what you're doing is wonderful. You've given your child the freedom to fully explore his own self, rather than being expected to conform to any one thing- which is about the best thing that any parent can do. Whatever he turns out to be, he'll be strong because he's always had that sort of support *smiles*.

I only hope that if I ever have kids myself that I'll be able to give them the same opportunities within an open-minded community.

Cama

[Eclecta]

Laz.. He is already beginning to sound more like an adult sometimes. He still has alot of growing up to do, but he is really surprising me some days. The things he says and does are sometimes very bizarre, but I guess I was that way when I was his age to.. well to a certain extend I'm sure.. Sean is about as active in the community as he will ever be... He isn't really interested in it, because he doesn't really understand it. Every now and then Sean still asks me, "You aren't going off drinking blood are you?" I just have to laugh. But I always reply, "No, of course not." I think the thing that confuses Sean the most is they "why" part.. Tho I have tried to explain it, you personally know how Sean is, so you know what it must be like to try to explain it. He busts out laughing starts cracking jokes and says, "Just don't drink all of my blood." I can't win.. Even if I try to be all serious, he just cracks up. But that is how he is.. And I love him anyway, even if he dones't understand or want too.

Cama... Thanks. I appreciate you kindness. You too will be a great mother some day. You don't realize the hows and whats about being a parent until you are in the situation. I would never have thought I would be handling things so rationally and calmly, especially since Chris seems to get me so wound up sometimes, knowing how to push my buttons etc. I know he is just at the age where he thinks he should test limits and assert his own individuality. He does things alot that make me wonder tho.. Like he wanted to use a name online, "DarkestEvil" and I told him "no. You aren't dark and you aren't evil. Pick something more suitable." And he did. I have no idea why he would choose a name like that other than him telling me it just sounds cool, but you don't want your kids to think they are evil, esp at that young of an age. LOL. No harm done tho...

[Camazotz]

lol... no that's true and he'd have probably not been taken as seriously either with that name- sadly I think a lot of the young ones don't always get helped because they come across as just being filled with teenage angst as they've not got the means to express themselves fully yet. You're doing fabulously though, be proud of yourself and feel secure that you've raised him well enough for him to get through all of this :)

[Lazarus]

darkness is a thing that we often fear because we it limits our perception and so it is a VERY powerfull thing, and Evil well Evil is the ultimate form of free expression, to be evil mean you follow only your own rules with NO regard to others, so there you have it two extreem forms of freedom and power. Chris very likly does not realise this at all or at least did not knowingly pick the name for those reason, but subconciously these are things we all know and so subconciously to pick such a name would make since for a growing boy seeking freedom and the power to effect to world arround him. The only difference is he does not FEAR the dark and has ben arround things commonly considered evil...us....so he doesnt accept the title of evil like others and sobecause he doesnt fear them he has no problem being arround them. granted he is not dark or evil, he is just experimenting, its a phase. Most chilren though they also seek power and freedom at such an age would not choose such an identity because they are brought up with a fear of both the dark and things evil. simple as that. but he is smart enough to listne to good wisdom too so no worries. OH YEAH WHO PASSED PSYCHOLOGY!!! BOO YA... hehehe sorry